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Sunday, July 22, 2012

A Hooker's Daughter

Last night, I had a lovely time at my friend Bella's house. We had dinner with her daughter and a few of her daughter's friends. Bella's daughter, Jane (not her real name), was kind enough to let me interview her after dinner. Jane is a 20 year old licensed cosmetologist, currently living with Bella, a 47 year old escort. Bella has been a sex worker for almost 30 years, and this is her primary source of income.

Here's the kicker- Jane knows that her mother is a sex worker. *GASP* Well, according to Shelley Lubben (and several other anti sex work crusaders), sex workers are bad parents. For the record, I saw no used condoms, syringes, dildos or crack pipes. In fact, her house looked quite similar to the one that I grew up in, and Bella looked just like any other mom. Stereotypes be damned!

Here is a transcript of the interview- Enjoy!

1. So your moms an escort? What's your understanding of this?

I understand that she sells her time and companionship. She does that and I understand that she has regular clients. I'm a hair dresser, so I get it. You book times, it's a commodity. Sex sells. Also, I'm proud of my mom because she was a drug user and most moms wouldn't have made it through. I don't judge others, there's a lot of things unjust in this world. Life is unfair. Life choices are just a personal modification of who you are in the end.

2. Are you okay with your mother being a sex worker?

I worry about her well being. I worry that she's alone and I wish she could find someone. I also worry about her history as a drug user; I worry when she's out. I don't judge her sex work. I understand that if I had to pay my bills I wouldn't be afraid to take care of it myself.

3. Have you done or seriously considered sex work?

I've grown up in middle class, and I've also grown up poverty level. If I needed to turn to that, I would do it and wouldn't feel bad about it. I have friends that do that and are models and suicide girls and they're hot, and I don't blame them. They're paid to take off their clothes. I'd consider doing it- using your looks as a skill is the same as using your intellect.

4. If you could change one thing about the sex industry, what would it be?

I feel like in my mom's field there's a lot of exploitation. I know there's exploitation of minors. However, why should we be condemning adult sex workers because of what's happening to these 16 year old sex slaves? They're not the same thing. It's like child porn versus adult porn.

5. In the way that it has to be regulated?

Yes, I think so, there should be regulations and laws that we abide by. People have the right to make their own choices, as long as they don't hurt anyone else.

6. Any last words?

Not really. I think my mom did a pretty good job of raising me, so I don't really give a crap about what anyone thinks. I'm proud of her and who she is.

Many thanks to Bella's wonderful daughter for the interview! Also, thank you to Bella for cooking and having me over! xo

Oh, and here's a photo of Bella's table. Check it out; fresh flowers, but no crack pipes! Yes, it's true, sex workers are "normal" people too. Some are addicts, some are not. Same could be said for the rest of the human race. Society needs to stop relying on stereotypes and start LISTENING. Oh and notice the book on the table; Cop to Call Girl by Norma Jean Almodovar. :-)