How many times have we read the "Diary of an Escort," "Diary of a Porn Star," "Diary of a Webcam Model" etc? If I glance over at my bookshelf right now, I see several autobiographies & literary collections of this nature. Everyone is dying to know what it's like to be a porn star, to fuck for money, to dance on stage, to work as a glamorous high-end escort. Hell, I've spent years reading these books! For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated with the psyche of the adult entertainer; entranced by these mysterious long-legged beauties and their equally stunning 6 inch heels. Who wouldn't be, right? Not until recently did I start to wonder about the ones on the other side-- the guys. The "johns," the "enthusiasts," the "hobbyists." I write a lot about the stigma that female performers have to face, but what about their clients? I'm willing to wager that they face just as much stigma; they're "losers," "virgins." After all, who the hell is desperate enough to PAY for sex? That's what we hear, over and over again, isn't it?
Curiosity always gets the best of me. Below is an interview with a 43-year old male who describes himself as a "cam model enthusiast."I hope you enjoy the read, and please feel free to leave comments. Also, HUGE thank you to this wonderful man for taking the time to be interviewed, and to put up with my non-stop questioning!
1. Can you tell me a bit about yourself, just some general background?
Sure. What year is it? Oh yeah, 2012; I'm 43 years old. It's just an arbitrary counter right? Anyways, I'm French Canadian and I live in the Montreal area. I work in IT, specifically, medical imaging. I like tinkering with computers and electronics. I play the guitar, electric and classical. Sometimes I sing in a choir, trying to learn the didgeridoo. I'm also a bit lonely, hence why I started looking at cam sites.
2. Can you tell me about your history of watching webcam performers, how you got into the whole cam model scene?
I think it was when I was reading a Reddit post sometime in July. Until then, the LiveJasmin pop-ups would just be an annoyance. (I interject here- "Those pop-ups ARE annoying!) A guy on Reddit was posting about the site Cam4. So, I checked it out and saw a couple, a hot girl giving a blowjob, all for free. Needless to say, I hung out for a bit! After a couple weeks of being a freeloader, I decided to create a free account. A couple of weeks later, I decided to pop my "pay for internet porn" cherry.
What made you decide to pay for it?
Enthusiast: Partly to encourage the performers who put on hot shows. And, after a while I started to have a few favourites. I felt that I should be compensating them for their time. I would chat with the models and get to know them. I started to pay for some of their videos and private one on one shows (usually via Skype), in addition to tipping them on their websites.
Have you ever been ripped off?
3. So, time for some of the boring details. How much time do you spend interacting with cam models? How much money do you spend per month? How many favourites do you have?
Well, judging from my last credit card bill, I'm spending much more than I should! I just got into this back in July, and I spent about $1000/month for the first couple of months. I'm trying to taper off to something that's more reasonable now. I am single and have some disposable income, so it's not a big deal.
As far as hours, I'd guess that I spend about 4-5 hours per week on cam sites/interacting with performers. I have 3 or 4 favorite models, and some favorite couples. Typically, weekends are when I spend the most time on the sites with the occasional weekday overnight, keeping myself company as I do some work off-hours.
4. So- the million dollar (or rather, thousand dollar) question- what do you get out of it? Besides for stimulus to jerk-off to?
Well there's the immediate sexual gratification, but I find more and more, it's a way of getting some human contact. Some "surrogate" relationship or companionship. Even if it's just 15 minutes, there's some companionship there. In a sense, I have multiple partners! Sometimes I will just hang out in the chat room and talk to the models and other patrons, like any other form of social networking.
Will you keep doing it even after you have a partner?
Enthusiast: I've actually been giving that some thought lately. I do want to find myself a romantic/sexual partner, and I've sort of come to the realization that I don't want to apologize for my sexuality anymore. so any future partner is going to have to be on more or less the same wavelength, maybe she would be up for couple's camming or something.
Same wavelength? Meaning sexually adventurous?
Well, isn't that every guy's fantasy? Along with "I need your cum on my face" haha!
Enthusiast: Basically. I think I messed up my last relationship because I was afraid to be sexually open and to share my fantasies with her. I was afraid of rejection. It probably would have turned out differently if I had been more upfront about my desires.
So will you want to perform on webcam with your partner, or watch together?
Enthusiast: If/when I'm in a new relationship, I can see myself incorporating this with my partner. It's fun and kinky, watching couples fucking and watching each other. Or watching a hot girl together, etc. I see a lot of couples on cam together and they seem to have a lot of fun. Although I probably wouldn't broach the topic on the first date!
Thank you SO MUCH to the Enthusiast who will remain anonymous, for his time and honesty!